not enough deep breaths in the world

i received a call this morning to officiate at a non-member funeral.  i said yes once confirming that my schedule is clear.  the deceased was a member of a conservative synagogue and the rabbi there was not available.  about 60 minutes later i received a call from the funeral home,

"rabbi, we're so sorry.  you are not allowed to officiate at the funeral because you are not a man and that is not allowed in this particular synagogue's cemetery."

after confirming the family was aware of this with the funeral home i freed up my schedule once again.

fortunately, the male senior rabbi at ts was as disgusted as i am.  he put a call into the rabbi at the conservative synagogue to find out the story. 

i don't think i could make this story up if i tried.